fairy tale

circa 04

i want to believe in a fairy tale, that my prince will come for me.
sweep me off my feet, tell me that he loves only me.
take to his castle in the sky, way up high, until i die.
i'd be in his arms and he's only reside in mine.
he'd tell the truth, he'd never lie.
take a stand for whatever is right.
die for me, save me from myself, save me from everyone else.
feeds me with constant love, fill me with joy, never depart, always hold my heart.
never go away, always stay. nearer to me, closer than close.
this is my fairy tale. i want a happy ending but it seems every time
i believe this i get seriously fucked.
my prince leaves me home to rot, never keeps me near his heart.
near his wallet and then we part.
loves me obligation, he lies cheats and steals.
slithers around like an eel.
makes me feel rejected, damns me for being me and seeks others company.
escapes to higher ground only to fall rock hard in a slump the next day.
he cowers from what is right because it makes him seem okay.
fills me with grief and then swears to the deceased that he loves only me.
when will i learn that fairy tales do not exist, that i'm getting pimped.
when will i see that my prince charming is the pea beneath my sheets,
permanently annoying me.
when will i learn that prince charming is a dick and that my only solution
is to kiss a few more frogs. hopefully if i kiss a few more my luck will change.
anything to get out of this.
how i long to be me, on my own i'd be free but i'm stuck here in the fantasy
that if i only stay a little longer he'll change.
i can make it one more day. maybe tomorrow will be different than yesterday.
maybe if i pray everything will be okay.
everything's okay.